A GLIMPSE IN THE LIFE OF A KEPT WOMAN

“Happy Birthday. I didn’t want to wake you. I figured you were tired with all the pounding that happened last night. I’ll be back by 10 AM to pick you up. Hopefully, you’d be all set by then. Don’t make me wait.” This was from the note that he left on the dining room table right next to the flowers, the chocolates, and a big rectangular box.

“Happy Birthday to me.” I greeted myself. The box – there can only be three things inside it. Jewelry. Dress. Lingerie. Or all of the above. And if my instincts are correct, he will be expecting I wear all three today.

Today, I turn 35. Yes… Thirty and five years of existence. Not 25 and definitely not 15. As I walked around my condo, I caught a glimpse of my reflection. I stopped and scrutinized myself closely. The fact that I look younger than most women who are of my age is a blessing. I have been called beautiful one too many times that I no longer believe it when they say I am. What is beauty anyway?

My perception of life is more real than it was 10 years ago, let alone 20 years ago. With everything that I have observed and personally experienced, I know I live with a realistic view rather than a fairy tale dream.

I have met plenty of men – married men mostly. I think I should mention I used to be in the escort business for 10 years. Men. It’s better not to overanalyze them. Men and me. Some just wanted to lay there naked and talk. Some wanted to try to fuck me silly. Others wanted to do something sexually specific with me. And some just wanted to relax and not be nagged and to forget about ‘life’ for just a moment. I could handle all of that simply because cash was handed to me and I needed it.

As for sex? I like sex. Heck, I love sex. I think about sex all of the time. It’s what got me into the escort business anyway. I want to be fucked, and men want to fuck me. I have embraced this side of me like I exuded with a ‘come fuck me’ scent. I don’t know if I have a certain look, but I actually love the idea of men wanting to fuck me and of wanting to pay to fuck me. It doesn’t bother me like it used to. I have come to accept that I am one lustful creature, and it is perfectly fine. Once I quit chasing love a long, long time ago, it became apparent to me who I really am inside.

I am so glad that I have been in a coldblooded state of mind for years now because I can truly enjoy having really amazing sex without all of the emotions that would usually come along with it.

And being the “other woman” is a role I think I can do fairly well. I mind the rules. I stay out of the way, and basically I am there with arms wide open and legs widespread with an eager pussy and a waiting mouth when he needs me. I guess the cash separates the feelings of guilt. Some days I can’t tell if I am just bitter or simply soulless. Other days, I don’t care as long as I get what I want. So I guess it is a pretty neat arrangement and it works out well for the most part.

Being an escort was more like “the other side of me.” I had a ‘regular’ life that doesn’t revolve around me being naked and getting fucked. I actually had a real career. I used to work as an editor/proofreader. Being an escort is not what I ‘do’. It is more of a fetish if anything. That is what I think. I mean the more I think about it the more I want to do it based on the simple fact that men are willing to pay me thousands just to touch me or have me touch them. And the fact that I get to pick and choose who I allowed to pay me and fuck me is awesome.

In my quest to finding a good lover to fulfill my shallow needs (money) and my sexual desires, I met Luc. Luc is a divorced, 40-year-old very rich and successful businessman. That first night right after a steamy fucking session, he offered me a proposal. To be his mistress and he will take care of me and everything that I need. I have had offers like that before from married men – young and old – and I have always said no. It’s one thing to be an escort. It’s another thing to be a kept woman – to just be with one guy, but he made a pretty much interesting case about it and I ended up saying yes before the night ended. Stipulations were made. A contract was drawn and signed. And here I am a year later.

Luc is one great lover. I have no complaints. Have you ever been fucking someone and it got so heated that your heart feels like it was going to burn up in your chest? Where you thought your head was going to explode? Where you feel like you were both going to spontaneously combust? I feel that with Luc every single time.

Last night, my pussy was so worked up by him that I felt like it was on fire. Not a bad burning sense but it was the same feeling that I feel in my chest and head when I am extremely turned on and at the highest point of ecstasy. I was still throbbing 2 hours later and he was asleep. I was still so fucking horny that I had to ride him and fulfill my desire.

I was so deep into it. I wasn’t sure how much more I could handle. It was fucking crazy. It’s not something that can be explained. The sex with Luc - it’s all I ever wanted. Just to be left trembling, drooling, and slightly embarrassed from being out of control for a moment in time and then feeling childlike when left with the anticipation of when I’ll get to see him again and fuck him again.

I never wanted to be a kept woman. But I am her. And I am no longer naive enough to think I’d find love at the bottom of the barrel no matter if the barrel is made of gold and lined with diamonds.

I checked the time. It was almost 9 AM. I have to go and get ready for my man.

UNINVITED - Part Three

 “Jace,

Dinner reservations. You know where. 6 PM.

I love you. R.”

Our anniversary.  Today’s our anniversary.  It would’ve been our 3rd year of marriage – if we are still together, that is.  I made the reservations 3 months ago.  It was our favorite restaurant – first date, his proposal, first year anniversary – almost every special occasion we celebrated as a couple we did there.

I checked my watch.  It’s 4:30 PM. Knowing how particular Jace is with time, I know he would be there by 5:30.  If I hurry, I can be there before 6 PM.  I stripped down and headed to the shower.

---------------------

February 14, 2008

“Babe...  I need to make a call.  I’ll be right back.”  Jace whispered in my ear.  I smiled at him and nodded.  He kissed me on the forehead before he stood up and left.

We were having our annual Valentine’s Day “party” with a couple of friends in an acoustic bar.  Tara, my closest female friend in the group was sitting beside me with her husband Norm.  She was glowing, as most pregnant women do.

“How far along are you?”  I asked Tara.

“Nearly three months.  I am so excited!”  Tara smiled and I reached for her hand and squeezed it.

“You, my friend, are going to be one great mom.”  I told her.

Norm and three other male friends excused themselves from the group.

“Where are the guys going?”  I asked Tara.

Before Tara could answer the lights in the bar dimmed.

“Performance night.”  I heard one of our girlfriends say and she winked at me.

“Good evening everyone.”  A deep nervous voice I recognize said over the microphone.

“Jace??!”  He was on the stage with the guys.  “What are they doing?”  I asked loudly.  The girls just smiled at me.

“Oh my god.”  Jace.  He was on the stage.  Is he going to sing?  He doesn’t sing in public.  In fact, he never sang in public.

“This is for you, Rein.”  He looked my way and grinned sheepishly.

And I heard the familiar opening strains of the song.

“It's her hair and her eyes today
that just simply take me away
and the feeling that I'm falling further in love
makes me shiver but in a good way”

My heart just skipped a beat.  I was in awe.  My guy.  My song.  That’s my guy singing my song.  He knew just how I loved this song.  There was one time a few months ago when we were lying next to each other, and he thought I was asleep.  He kissed me on the forehead and sang me this song.  I pretended I was asleep then and just listened to him – my heart overflowing with emotions.  The feeling that I had then was just as intense as the feeling that I am having now.

The girls were teasing me.  I can’t even hear what they were saying.  All I could hear is Jace – my Jace.

“It's a masterful melody when she calls out my name to me
as the world spins around her she laughs, rolls her eyes
and I feel like I'm falling but it's no surprise”

“Rein!”  I heard Deb say.  “You have to go onstage.”

“Yes!”  Another friend piped in.  “Let’s get her onstage!”

“What?”  I looked at them as they all stood up.  I heard Tara laugh.  “Come on you lucky girl…”  She said as she helped me up.

“I can’t go on stage!”

“But you have to, Rein.  It’s all part of the plan.”  Deb said as she took my arm and led me towards the stage.

“Plan?”  I looked at Deb.  “What plan?”

“Oh shush now…”  Tara said.  “Just go.  Stand beside your man.”  Me?  Go up on stage?  “Go!”  Tara urged.

I just nodded.  I turned my attention to Jace, and I walked towards him.

“Coz I love her with all that I am
and my voice shakes along with my hands”
cause it's frightening to be swimming in this strange sea
but I'd rather be here than on land
yes she's all that I see and she's all that I need
and I'm out of my league once again”

Jace held out his hand.  I took it.

We were on the stage.  People were watching.  But all I could hear was him.  All I could see was him.  I didn’t even realize the song was over, and he stopped singing until the crowd cheered.

“Are you okay, Babe?”  He was smiling.

“Oh you!”  That was all that I managed to say as I gave him a tight hug.  He laughed and kissed me on the forehead. 

“Okay Buddy.”  Norm said as he and the guys stood up and started to leave.  “The stage is all yours.”

“Good luck!”  They all said in unison with silly grins on their faces.

“Thank you guys!”  Jace told them.

Good luck?  The stage is all yours?  The song?  Is this…?

I couldn’t think.  It was getting hard to breathe normally.  No, it can’t be.

“Jace?”  I looked at him questioningly.

He smiled yet again.  His hands were shaking.  He was nervous about something.

“Rein…”  Is he going to ask me?  Is it today?  Is it now?  But I forced myself to keep quiet.

“Wait…  I have to do this right.”  He went down on one knee.  The crowd cheered.  I was rooted to my spot.

Oh my god!  He is proposing!  I felt my throat gone dry.  My heart…  It felt like it wanted to jump out of my chest.  I placed a hand right over my heart.  A silly attempt to keep it still.

“I love you, Rein.  You’re my best friend, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”  He started to say.

I could feel my tears are about to fall.  This is definitely the moment.

“I guarantee there'll be tough times.  It may come to a point that you’d get frustrated with me and me with you.  But I also guarantee that if I don't ask you to be mine, I'll regret it for the rest of my life because I know in my heart that you're the only one for me.”

“Oh, Jace…”  I whispered.  I was crying – of too much joy.

He got something out of his coat pocket.  I know that ring.  I have seen it before.

“It’s my grandmother’s engagement ring.  She wanted me to give this to the girl I want to spent forever with.”

I’ve seen the ring before when I met his grandmother a few years ago.  It was a ring with a diamond centerpiece surrounded by blue sapphires.  It was an heirloom ring and I know it had been in his family for a long time.

“Marry me, Rein.”  Jace offered the ring to me.  “Be my wife.”

“Jace…”  I sobbed. 

He looked at me expectantly.  Waiting for my answer.

“Rein!  Say yes already!”  I heard Norm shout.

“Oh shut up, Norm.”  That was Tara.

“Yes!”  I blurted out.  Jace stood up and kissed me on the lips.  Hard.  I kissed him back until we both ran out of breath.  The people were clapping and cheering - a standing ovation.

“You know I will say yes.”  I told him.”

He slipped the ring on my finger.  It was a perfect fit.  I couldn’t stop crying.

“I hope these are tears of joy.”  He wiped my tears away.

“They are.”  I held his hands and kissed them.  “You made me so happy.”

---------------------

He was there sitting at our usual spot.  I checked the time.  It was 5:45.  I was right.  He is never late.

“Babe…”  I called as I neared the table.  He didn’t move.  He didn’t even turn my way.

“Sorry to keep you waiting…”  I said as I kissed him on the cheek.  He acted as if a cool air brushed his skin.  He didn’t say a thing.

I sat down and looked at him.  Cold.  He looks and feels so cold.  I can’t believe things are this worse between us.

“Jace…”  I started to say.

But he ignored me.  I blinked my tears away.  His silence.  His coldness.  It was like I am looking at a different person.  This isn’t the man I love!  This isn’t the man I married!

A stranger –I am staring at a stranger.

---------------------

“Does that feel good?”  I heard him ask.  I opened my eyes and saw Jace – my Jace – grinning mischievously.  He had his hand underneath my skirt.  His middle finger was teasing my clit – with my panties on!

I almost forgot we’re in a public place!  We were sitting next to each other in our favorite spot in a restaurant.

“Mmmm.”  I nibbled at my lower lip and said, “I think it would be better if you pulled down my panties.”

“Is that so?”

I gave him a lusty wink.  He chuckled softly but didn’t reply.  A moment later, I felt him slip his fingers in the waistband of my panties.  I had to raise myself a bit to allow him to slide my panties down my legs until they were off.

We were in a public restaurant full of people, and we were acting like we had the restaurant to ourselves!  I no longer care.  My thoughts are focused on what he was going to do to me.

I saw him slip my panties in his pocket.  “You’ll get these back when we get home.  Maybe.”

“Touch me.”  I heard myself say.  “I dare you to touch me.”

I know he’d be up to my dare.  If I didn’t feel his fingers on my clit soon I know I’d go crazy.

His mouth curved into a sexy smile.  God!  This man is so sexy, and he is mime.  All mine!  I felt him slide his hand between my legs, and he ran his fingers along my pussy.

I had to suppress the groan that escaped from my lips.  He was looking at me intensely.  The bastard – he was enjoying this as I was.

He found my clit and began to make slow, lazy circles on it.  And I wanted to rotate my hips in time with his movements.  I wanted to grind against his hand but I couldn’t.

I was almost on the verge of coming.  He knows it.  I felt him stop playing with my clit.  I was about to open my mouth to complain only to let out a moan when I felt him slide his finger inside my wet passage.  He was moving his finger in and out, slowly fucking me with it.  I had to stop myself from moaning to loud.  Damn, he is good at this.

“Jace.  Oh god, you are driving me crazy here.”  I whispered.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No.”  I said abruptly.

“I won’t stop.  Not until I make you come.”  I heard him promise.  I could only moan.

I was getting lost in his touch.  His fingers were absolutely magical.  He knew exactly what to do to get me off.  And considering how aroused I was already, he knew it didn’t take much.

“Oh god… I’m coming!”  I leaned against his shoulder and tried to hide myself from anyone who might see.

“Let it go babe.  Come for me.”  He urged.

I felt ripple after ripple of pleasure emanate from my clit and I let out one long moan half-frustrated that I couldn’t scream or moan out loud.

As my orgasm subsided, he kissed me on the forehead and said, “Happy 2^nd Anniversary Babe…”

---------------------

“Sir, your dinner will be available in 10 minutes.  Do you need anything?”  I heard the waiter tell Jace.

“No.  That is all.”  Jace said dismissively.

And the waiter left us.

My heart – it’s breaking slowly.  I have to reach out to him.  I have to talk to him.  We have to fix this.  I cannot just sit and do nothing about it.  I knew what we have is worth saving.  But how?  He is so withdrawn.

“Happy 3^rd Anniversary, Babe.”  I whispered.

He was quiet.  Eerily quiet.  Did he even hear me?  He is acting as if I am not sitting here in front of him.

I was about to reach out to touch his hand when Jace spoke, “I can’t do this.”

And that startled me.  “What do you mean?”  I asked.

“I just can’t keep doing this.  This is torture.”

“What are you saying?”  It can’t be.  He can’t mean it.  And because I really wanted to know even if it hurt me I had to ask him.  “Are you giving up on us?”

But he ignored me and just continued talking, “I can’t pretend like nothing’s happened.  I can’t go on pretending I am okay.”

“Jace, we can save this.  I know we can.”

“I miss you, Rein.”

That did it.  My tears flowed like a river.  “Oh, Jace.  I miss you too!”

He was crying!  My Jace was crying.  “Why did you have to go?  Why did you leave me?”

Go?  Leave?  “What do you mean go?  I didn’t leave.  I’m right here.”

“I miss you so much, Rein…”  He sobbed.

Why can’t he hear me?  I reached out to touch his hand and when my skin touched his, visions flashed through my mind.  It was as if I was transported back in time.

Of me and Jace in the car on our way to a friend’s party.

“We are not done talking, Rein.  We will talk about this when we get home later.”  He was angry.  I could tell he was angry.

“Fine.”  Why is he being so difficult?

My reply must’ve irked him because he turned to me then and said, “Why are you so stubborn?”

“I am not being stubborn, Jace.”  I could feel a headache coming along.  I’m getting tired of this fighting.  “Can we not please talk about this now.”  I massaged my temple in an attempt to get rid of the headache.

“Oh no, Rein.”  His voice getting loud.  “We are talking about this now.  Right now.”  He turned to me then and was about to say something when I saw an old lady crossing the street and we were about to hit her.

“Jace!”  I shouted.  “Look out!”

Jace swerved to the left in an attempt to avoid the old woman but lost control.  I was panicking.  Jace was telling me to relax but I could hear the panic in his voice.  It was as if the car had a mind of its own.  I heard screams from people on the street.  I heard tires screeching.  Everything happened so fast.  And then I blacked out.

I have gone still.  A cold shiver ran through my spine.  The accident.  There was an accident a few weeks ago.  We were having a fight then.  And we hit a lamppost.

I looked at Jace and he held his head low.  Crying, he was still crying.

“My Jace…”

“We have to stabilize her.”  I didn’t recognize the voice.

An ambulance.  I could hear its siren.  I opened my eyes, and I was lying on a gurney. Inside the ambulance.   Blood.  I see blood on my dress.  People.  There were people all around me.  I couldn’t make out what they were saying.  They were talking all at the same time.

“Jace?”  I called out.  My head hurts like hell.  It felt like it was breaking into two.

I felt someone hold my hand.  “Rein…  Thank god.  I’m sorry.  I’m so sorry.”  He was sobbing. He was no longer wearing his jacket.   There was blood all over his white shirt.  Was that his blood?

“Jace, are you hurt?”  My voice sounded weak.  I felt weak.

“Shhh… Babe. . Don’t worry about me.”  He kissed my hand and held it close to his face.  His eyes still wet with tears.  “You’re going to be okay.  Everything’s going to be all right.”

I wanted to believe him.  But why do I feel like it’s not going to be?  I look at Jace – the love of my life – crying beside me.

“I love you, Jace…”  I whispered.

“I love you, Rein.”  He told me.  “Be strong Babe.  Please…”

Be strong.  And I feel so weak.

“I love you so much…”  I told him.  I closed my eyes.

“Rein!  No!!!!”  Jace shouted.

I wanted to open my eyes and look at him one last time but I couldn’t.

“We’re losing her.  We’re losing the patient.”

“Rein, don’t leave me…  Open your eyes babe, please…  Please babe…”  Jace pleaded.  His voice sounding hoarse now.  And I felt his lips as the touched mine.  “I love you, My Rein.”

And the last thing I heard was Jace.

And the last thing I felt was his kiss on my lips.

I died.  The realization finally set in.

I died that night.

--- THE END ---

HALF-LIFE (Back to Black Reverse) Part 3

“Maybe, I need to see the daylight

To leave behind this half-life

Don't you see I'm breaking down”

Two Months Later

Are things back to normal now?  I asked myself.

Over the past 2 months, I’ve been trying to keep busy and drowning myself with work.  It helps, but it had not been enough to totally forget Rem.

----------------------------

"I want your ass."  I heard myself say.  I blurted out what has been in my mind for days now.

“What?”  I noted the surprise in her voice.  God, I must’ve sounded like a pervert!

"I want..."  I started to say again.

"I heard you the first time.  Are you talking about ----" And I heard her stop before she continued saying, "Anal sex?"

"Yes.  Can we?"

"But I haven't tried that before..."

"I haven't either, but I have been wanting to do it with you.  Can we?"

And I knew she wouldn’t say no.  She couldn’t say no.  At least not to me.  I have a power over her.

"Okay."  I heard her say softly.

"Really?  We can try it?"  I was grinning.

"I said yes, didn't I?"

My grin widened.  "Good!  Now, roll over."

I saw her hesitate for a bit but then went and did what I asked and positioned herself – all fours with her naked ass in the air.  My cock hardened in anticipation.  I didn’t want her to change her mind and I didn’t give her a chance to argue.

I parted her butt cheeks and delved her asshole with my tongue.  She moaned.  The unexpected sensation that my tongue is creating must have felt good.  When it seemed to me that she was starting to relax and enjoy what my tongue was doing, I gradually introduced a finger inside her hole.  I felt her tense and she held her breath.

"Relax.  We'll go slowly.  I promise.  Di kita sasaktan."  I tried to soothe her nerves.  I used my other hand to circle her clit.  She let out another moan as I pressed a finger deeper in her as while I increased the pressure on her clit.  Every feeling seemed to have been intensified a hundredfold by the combination of both sensations because I felt her knees quiver and her moans increased.  She was gasping for air.

"Ready for more?"  I asked huskily.  I am so turned on right now.  She nodded, and I slowly entered a second finger inside her ass.  I felt her shudder.  "How does it feel, Rem?  Tell me."  I was breathless, as was she but I wanted to know how it feels for her.

"Fine."  She managed to choke out.   "Good."  She was panting now.

I moved behind her until my mouth was near her ear.  I noted how my voice was gruff when I told her, "I'm gonna fuck you the normal way for a bit while my fingers are in your ass so you can get used to it, okay?  Okay baby?"

She nodded her head.  I put on an unused rubber we had left and moved back into position behind her.

We both moaned when I slid my cock deep inside of her.  I set the rhythm and inserted two more fingers in her ass – now she has three inside.  I was cock-fucking her pussy, finger-fucking her asshole, and playing with her clit – all at the same time.  She was moaning like crazy.

"Oh baby, your pussy... is... so.... weeeett!"  The feel of her pussy walls tightening around my cock was just too much, too good.

"Joe, I'm going to come!"  She was gasping for air.

"Hold on sweetie.  I want to be in your ass when you come."

She nodded.  I moved faster than I could ever imagine.  Too soon, the pressure of my cockhead wet with her own pussy juice replaced my fingers.  In mere seconds, I was pressing it in slowly, firm but gentle, until I pushed past the tight muscles and slid in the rest of the way.  We were both holding our breaths the whole time.  Oh my god!!!  She was so tight!

"Oh my god! You feel amazing!"  I gasped.  I slipped inside her ass deeply and held perfectly still.  Then, he started to move slowly.

She was quiet.  I must be hurting her.  I have to make this good for her too.  I can’t stop now.  I can’t pull my cock out of her sweet, tight hole.

I thumbed her clit with light touches then pushed two fingers inside her pussy and started finger fucking her.  I felt her brace herself as she was thrown immediately into throes of orgasm.  I heard her scream – her scream of ecstasy.  I gripped her hips hard as I thrust my cock into her and felt myself shudder and groan as I empty myself inside her ass.

---------------

“Sir, I need your signature?”

“What?”  It was as if I just came out of a trance.  Where am I?  Right…  At work.

“I need your signature.”  Mrs. Reyes, my long-time secretary, was just standing there in front of me.

“How long have you been standing there?”  I asked her as she handed me the piece of paper she wanted me to sign.

“Five minutes, maybe.  You seemed preoccupied with something, and it looked like you were in deep thought.”

I handed her the document and uttered apologies.  She smiled and then left.

“Lately, something here don't feel right

This is just a half-life

Is there really no escape?

No escape from time of any kind?”

“Yeah, Bry…”  I was walking along the fruits section of the supermarket with my pushcart.  “Yes.  Yes.  I have to pick up a few things.”  I grabbed a pack of limes and apples and pushed my cart again.  “It’s all good, Pare.  Yes.  See you in a bit.”  I had to put my phone back in my pocket and wasn’t looking where my cart’s headed.

WHAM!!  I hit another cart.

Annoyance was etched on my face and I was ready to give the other cart owner a piece of my mind when I saw and recognized her face.  Rem!  She was shocked as I was and just stared at me as if I were a ghost.

Before she made a move to run away, I acted as swiftly as I can and held her by the hand.

“Let go, Joe.”

“Rem, we need to talk.”

“We have nothing to talk about.  You chose your own way.  I chose mine.  That’s the end of it.”

“Rem, I needed to explain…”

“Oh there you are, Joe!  I’ve been looking all over for you.”  I turned and saw Meg walking towards us.

My hold on Rem slackened a bit.  I saw Rem’s face as she looked at Meg and me and her gaze darkened.  Perfect timing Meg!  Real perfect timing.

And before I could do anything, Rem left her cart and ran.  I went after her.  “Rem, wait!!”

And just like in the movies, when the guy goes after a girl he loves, the girl gets lost in the crowd.

“What was that about?”  I heard Meg ask.  She went after me and pushing my cart.

“Just someone I know.”  I answered.

“Was that…..”

“Yes.”  I didn’t let her finish.

I felt Meg touch my shoulder.  “I am sorry, Joe.  I shouldn’t have interrupted.”

“Not your fault Meg.  I think she would still run away.”

Meg squeezed my shoulder as if silently telling me things will be okay.

“Let’s go.  Your husband’s waiting.”  I took the cart away from her and headed for the counter.

Yes, Meg and Bry are now happily married.  It turned out my best friend had a thing for my ex-girlfriend, and they are great together.

TO BE CONTINUED

PLEASURED

We gazed into each other’s eyes warmed by our naked embrace.  To me, it felt like we were connected on a deeper level.  Whatever this is between us – there were no labels.

Labels are for fools, and fools fall in love.  At least that is what you keep on saying.  I feel differently though but that is another story.

“Do you trust me?”  You ask.

Instead of answering “yes” I gave you a long, deep kiss – putting all my emotions into it.

You smiled when I ended the kiss.  You stared at me for a bit and I thought I saw something flash in your eyes.  Or was I just seeing things?  You held my hand and led me to follow you to the bed.

“Lie down.”  You say.  I complied.

You let me lie on my back with a pillow under my head and another under my hips to elevate my pelvis.  I bit my lip in anticipation.

“You are so beautiful.”  You say it.  You mean it.  And I believe it.

I wanted you to kiss me senseless – to feel those lips on mine, your tongue teasing my tongue…  Oh but I agreed to do this and you had other agenda in mind.

You bend my knees and open my legs wide.    I should feel exposed, but I don’t.  You have seen all of me.

You sit comfortably between my legs with your legs crossed.

“Remember what I told you earlier.  Deep breaths.”  You reminded me.  I nodded.

You poured massage oil on your hands, and you begin by massaging my legs and my thighs, encouraging me to relax and to start taking deeper breaths.

I closed my eyes.  The scent of the massage oil filled the air.  It was intoxicatingly relaxing.  Your fingers were both firm and light at the same time – massaging my stomach area, my breasts, and my arms.

I felt my nipples pucker up and my clit tingle in anticipation.  I was hoping your thumb would accidentally graze my nipples as you massaged both of my breasts, but you made sure that that did not happen.  I moaned and suppressed a smile.

You worked every muscle gently, and I could feel a warm glow spread throughout my body.  I have never felt so relaxed and yet so turned on in my entire life!

You then proceeded to my pelvic area and then moved down to my inner thighs.  With your right hand, you poured a liberal amount of scented oil to my pussy – it was enough so that it started to drip down my outer pussy lips and generously covered the outside of my cunt.  I had to suppress a moan.  I was way beyond excited.

You ever so gently rubbed oil on my outer lips.  I bit back a loud sigh and told myself to relax, but I was breathing heavily now.

With your thumb and your index finger, you squeezed each pussy lip and slid your finger up and down the entire length of each lip.

“Oh my god!”  I nearly shouted.  You laughed and just told me to relax.

“Relax?  Are you fucking kidding me?”

You squeezed my inner lip again this time putting more pressure into it that I almost ran out of air.  “How… can… I … relax… with … what… you… are … doing?”  I heard you chuckle and I wanted to hit you in the head, but this feels good.  Too good.

Then you started stroking my clit in a circular motion.  My hips buckled.  I started grabbing handfuls of the duvet.  “Oh god!”  You stroked my clit clockwise and then counterclockwise.  “Oh shit!”

I was nearly hyperventilating and you told me to relax and tale deep breaths again, which I did or at least tried too.

You squeezed my clit between your thumb and index finger and then ever so slowly inserted your middle finger inside me.  I felt my pussy welcome your finger inside me.  I wanted more than that finger.  I wanted you – to feel that cock inside me – and yet your finger is doing wonderful things to me.

I felt that finger explore and massage the insides of my pussy – up, down, and around.

You then bent your finger and made contact with my G-spot!  That contact did it.  I felt myself come undone and I came.  I had to scream – with pleasure – as I felt my pussy juices flow.  And I thought you will stop.  And I thought that was the end of it.  But your finger was still inside me.

You continued the massage, varying the speed, the pressure, the motion.  You told me to keep breathing and never once broke eye contact.  My cheeks are flushed.  I almost felt like crying.  Too much.  Too good.  And yet I want more.

You then introduced a second finger inside me.  The sensation of two fingers massaging my inner pussy muscles was too much, too good – but it felt right.  I then felt your thumb rub my clit and that almost made me leap off the bed.  Another finger went inside me.  Oh god!

Just when I thought it could never get any better than this, you introduced your pinkie finger in my anus.  That feels sooooo good!

I read somewhere that when a man’s pinkie finger is in a woman’s anus with his index, long, and ring fingers and his thumb on her clitoris that he is “holding one of the mysteries of the universe in his hand.”

But I cannot really dwell on that thought right now.  The sensation of having both holes filled and my clit played was just too much to handle.  I was nearly on the edge of coming.  So close to the edge.

“Come again for me.”  I heard you say.

With that, I felt myself convulse and screamed his name.

BLISS

Oh what a night it was!  A night of the hottest and most passionate moment that I have ever experienced in my entire life.  My heartbeat now moves in a slow steady rhythm; my breathing has now normalized; my body is tired and sore – but my heart is filled with love.

I rest my head on your chest and hear your heartbeat and your deep, even breathing.  You are so content and peaceful.  I love you completely.  I know that now.  And as I watched you sleep I couldn’t help but ask myself, will you still love me tomorrow?

I have never watched a grown man sleep before.  It had kind of a stalker-ish ring to it though.  Why are you so perfect?

“You are mine.”  Two powerful words that you uttered right before you spilled your seed inside me.  And you own me.  A smile played on my lips at that thought - I am yours.

I found myself kissing your chest – little butterfly kisses – and my hand began to wander spanning your chest, and where my hand goes my lips follow leaving more butterfly kisses in their wake.

I heard a low moan.  I look up and see you looking back at me with a smile on your lips.  You are awake!  I reached up to touch your cheek and to trace the bottom of your lip with my little finger.  But it was not enough.  Suddenly, I was hungry for more.  I have to kiss you – taste your lips against mine and kiss you and kiss you again and again and yet again.

My hand began to wander again.  It wandered from your cheek to your neck with warm kisses trailing close behind.  From your neck, it wandered to your chest playing over a nipple that hardened at its touch.  Across your belly I roam, over your hip, and down your thigh.  I know now where my hand is wandering, and I must follow.

I lean over you and trace my fingers back up your thigh – staking claim over what is mine.  Yes mine.  All mine.  This thick, long shaft that has freed my body and has enslaved my soul.  This is what I dream of.  This is what I desire.  I can feel it swell and lengthen under my soft, feminine touch.  I lean over and kiss its sweet, silken head.  I can taste the mingled flavors of your juices and mine.  Still, a kiss could never be enough and a taste left me wanting for more.

With one hand on your belly and the other gently stroking your shaft, I begin to taste more and more.  My tongue swirled around the head of your cock, licking your shaft.  I want it all – your cock in my mouth, to feel it pressing the back of my throat.

I can feel your need rising as I take you fully into my mouth.  Your sweet cock grew more rigid by the moment, longer, thicker.  I know I cannot possibly take it all yet my desire grew as quickly as yours.  The heat in my mouth spreading all over my body and radiated towards my now wet pussy.  I must have all of you.  I need all of you.  Now!  It has to be now!

My body still ached and my cunt still sore, but I cannot wait another moment.  I straddled your hips and guided your hard cock into my wet, hot waiting pussy.  I sighed and became still while my swollen pussy lips stretched and accommodated your thickness.  Oh yes!  That feels so good!  I place your hands on my hips.  I wanted you to set the pace.   Now this is where I belong.  This is bliss!

THE STORY OF US

I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us

How we met and the sparks flew instantly

People would say, "they're the lucky ones"

THE STORY OF US

“I have been dying for this."  He bent his head down and tongued my nipple.  I moaned and pushed my chest into his mouth.

I felt him slip my dress all the way down.  His thumbs slid into the waistband of my lace underwear and shoved them down my hips.  I now stand fully naked with my back against the wall.

I was sitting in our usual coffee table near the park awaiting his arrival.  Coffee freshly served by the attendant, my iPad in my hand, and I was looking around, observing, watching people.

There was a young couple sitting on the bench absorbed in each other’s presence and paying no heed to everyone else around them.  Yep, that’s love right there.  Oh to be young and in love!

I smiled.

I took a sip of my coffee, and his face suddenly flashed in my mind.  I smiled yet again.  And this seems to be happening lately.  I have been walking around with a smile on my face.  He does that to me.  The mere memory of him brings a smile to my face.

An elderly couple sat on a corner table in front of me.  The man assisted his partner and helped her to her seat.  The woman smiled at him, and I thought I saw a twinkle in her eyes.  He bent down his head and whispered something in her ear.  She laughed and held his hand and kissed it.

That definitely is love!  And I couldn’t help but wish that I too will have that kind of love in my golden years.  To grow old with someone you love, now that’s a feat.

And then I saw him.  Even from a distance, I knew it was him.  That my heart recognized his presence was such a surprise.

He smiled and gave me a wave, and my heart skipped a beat.  I ran my fingers through my hair and hoped I still looked okay.  I flashed him a smile and waved back.

Damn!  I love this man.  That much is true.  I feel like a school girl with the seismic wave-like emotions that threatened to consume me.

As he neared the table, I stood up and straightened my dress and brushed off an imaginary dirt off my shoulder.  “Hi!”  I managed to say to him.

He smiled yet again and gave me a hug – a tight one.  “Have you been waiting long for me?”

And I wanted to answer, “All my life.”

Three months ago…

“Ma’am, here’s the coffee you ordered.”  I heard the female attendant say as she placed the cup of coffee on the table.  I looked up and gave her my thanks.  It’s my third cup for the day, and I have only been sitting here for an hour!

I turned my attention back to my laptop and looked at the screen.  I am stumped.  I don’t know what else to write.  I needed a breather.

I closed my laptop and for the first time in the hour that I have been there I looked around me.

I have been frequenting this coffee shop not only for the great coffee they serve but because of the location.  It’s conveniently located near the park.

I love parks.  It reminds me of my childhood when my dad used to take me to the park and teach me how to ride a bike or Sunday picnics with the family.

I felt a warm breeze brush my skin, heard the laughter of kids running around the park, and the smell of the coffee and I closed my eyes and just took the moment of it all in.  The thought if it all drew a small to my face.

I opened my eyes and saw a camera flash from a short distance.

Did somebody just took my picture?

I strained my neck to see who it was.  He knew I saw him.  Amid the distance, our gazes met.  I raised an eyebrow, and I saw him smile.  He started to walk towards me.

Is he coming over?  It definitely looks like he is.

I pretended to look away and watched the park.

He stopped short as he neared my table.  “Sorry for the intrusion.”  I heard him say.

I looked up to him and just stared.  He was wearing glasses now.  I failed to see that earlier.  He must’ve put it on when I looked away.  His SLR camera hung by his neck.

He must be a photographer or one of those photographer wannabes who think they are professionals just because they own an SLR.

“I apologize for being so forward.”  His long hair was tied.  Nice eyes, I noted – very expressive eyes.  “I couldn’t help it.  I saw you and I suddenly found myself holding the camera and taking your picture.”

I laughed.  “Is that the best pickup line you can come up with?”

He grinned.  “No.  Not a pickup line though it may sound like it.  I’m Max, by the way.”

He extended his hand.  I took it.  “Jem here.  Care to join me?”

He removed his clothes never taking his mouth away from my skin.  He was sucking the pulse point on my neck, he was kissing my chin, he was licking my nipples -- I felt him everywhere and all over me.

He kicked his boxers off and pressed his nakedness against me.  He pinned my wrists above my head with my back arched against the wall, my breasts pushing against his chest, and he slid one thigh between my legs.

There were moments when we were talking as we sit across each other that I wanted to reach out and grab a hold of his hand, look at him straight in the eyes, and tell him how I feel.

But of course, I stopped myself.  I feel a tad bit confused.  I wanted to tell him I loved him but where to start?  Should I just blurt it out loud and say, “Hey, I love you” out of the blue?

And what will he say?

What if he doesn’t feel the same way?

I have known him for a few months now.  This coffee table near the park had been our meeting place.

Every week we would meet – the same time and the same place; a “planned ran into each other” kind of thing.

“I finally found someone

who knocks me off my feet

i finally found the one

who makes me feel complete

it started over coffee

we started off as friends

it’s funny how from simple things

 the best things begin”

I had to suppress a grin when I heard the first few lines of the song.  This song is sooo US!

He then stood up and surprised me when he held out his hand and said, “May I have this dance?”

That startled me and then I laughed out loud.  “What?  Here?”

He grabbed both my hands and helped me up.  He then guided both my hands to his neck, and we were face to face.  So close.  I could smell his perfume.  “Yes.  You.  Me.  Here.”

My heart melted for the umpteenth time.  Why is it that he utters the most wonderful things with perfect timing?

Oblivious of the curious stares from all the people around us, he held me closer his hands resting behind my back as if he never wanted to let me go.  And I never wanted him to let me go.

This magical feeling no words could ever describe.  This perfect moment I feel no one could ever ruin.  This man – whom I love with all my heart and my soul – with his arms around me – yes, it was bliss.

And so this is love.

I found myself rubbing my wet pussy against his thigh muscles frantically rocking against his leg and he pushed back even harder.

I gasped as I felt his mouth close over one nipple.  His cock was sliding against my thigh - waiting and ready.

He then slid down to his knees and buried his face between my legs.  "No, I want you.  I want your cock."  I protested but he ignored me and slid his tongue right in.

I felt my tears start to fall.  He saw and was about to come near me when I stopped him, “No.  Don’t come near me.”

“You know I can’t stand to see you cry.”

I shook my head no.  “You will have to.  Just for a moment.”

“Jem, please?”

I tried to steady myself and tried blinking back my tears and failed.  “Whatever it is or what we have made together, I told you I will not take more than what you wanted to give me.  I meant that.”

He was quiet, but he was watching me with a pained expression on his face.  “I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“As did I, Max.”  My heart was bleeding.  I could feel it.  I wanted to hate him, but what good would that do?

“I just wish…”

“Wish what, Max?  You have made your choice.  I do not want to come in between.”  I steadied myself and blinked the tears away to make me see clearly.

“Jem, I am sorry.”

“I am sorry too… that I have come to love you this much but this isn’t going anywhere.”

“Please...  Let me hold you.”

I shook my head no.  I studied him, drawing his image inside my head, my heart – where I would keep it.

I slowly backed away.  I closed my eyes took a deep breath and opened them.  My eyes glittered with fresh tears.  “Have a good life, Max.”

And I started to walk away.

Why are you walking away?  Why are you leaving?  Can’t you see that he needs you right now?  Go back and stand by his side.  Hold his hand.  He could be making a very big decision right now.  Stand by him and tell him you love him.  Fight for your love.

I wanted to go back.  I wanted to turn around and run back to him.  Maybe… Just maybe if I go back to him, he’ll pick me.  Maybe if I… But who am I kidding?

Like the coward that I was, I walked away.  And he didn’t stop me.

He thumbed my clit, rubbing circles on the sensitive nub, his tongue moving in and out.  I felt myself begin to convulse and he slipped two fingers into me and finger fucked my while he sucked on my clit, hard and fast.

I screamed.  Even I myself couldn't make out the sounds I was making.  I came.  Hard against his lips, his tongue, and his fingers.

“I have been flooding my Facebook wall with quotes from "By The River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept" -- a good friend of mine gave me this book as a birthday present a few months ago, little did I know that I would be experiencing almost the same thing that the lead female in the book did.  In my wildest imagination, I never thought I'd be going through that ordeal -- of loving someone who isn't really yours for the taking. But unlike Pilar, quite sadly my story took a different turn.  Alas!  No happy endings were written and Him and Me parted ways.”

I don't know what to say

Since a twist of fate

When it all broke down

And the story of us

Looks a lot like a tragedy now

THE END